Wordiness is the most common enemy of a clear, brief, compelling writing style. Wherever there’s deadwood in writing, there’s also a loss of vigor. That’s why skilled writers try to make every word count.
There are many sources of deadwood, but repetitions and redundancies are among the easiest to spot and fix. Garden-variety clutter often is heralded by a preposition — a good reason to examine and cut prepositional phrases whenever possible. And redundancies are easy for the careful writer or editor to spot because they say the same thing twice.
“At this point in time” instead of “now,” for example, is garden-variety clutter. “Current incumbent” and “12 noon (or 12 midnight)” are redundancies. You can see that redundancies are not only wordy but also can be thoughtless, even silly. Still — probably because we see and hear them so often — they are easy to overlook.
Here’s a list of some common redundancies and deadwood expressions, with concise substitutes. You’ll recognize most of these examples immediately — maybe in some cases (if you’re like me), with a guilty blush.
conducted an investigation into: investigated
during the course of the investigation: during the investigation
made the statement that: said
at a later date: later
were found to be in agreement: agreed
succeed in making: make
make use of or utilize: use
were in attendance: attended
crisis situation: crisis
despite the fact that: although
prior to: before
subsequent to: after
say they are of the opinion: say they think or believe
on the occasion that: when
give consideration to: consider
have the need for: need
made an effort: tried
in conjunction with: with
as to whether: whether
until such time as: until
with the exception of: except
in other cases: otherwise
a sufficient number of: enough
in the vicinity of: near
located at: at
on a daily basis: daily
on a regular basis: regularly
on an experimental basis: experimentally
by the same token: likewise or similarly
which is called: called
continue on: continue
a distance of 35 miles: 35 miles
of an irreversible nature: irreversible
has the ability to: can
was declared the winner: won
said he was not in a position to: said he couldn’t
said in a quiet tone of voice: said quietly
the reason is because: the reason is
the reason why he: the reason he
nodded her head: nodded
shrugged his shoulders: shrugged
a number of; a small number of; few in number: some or several or few
in this day and age; at this point;
at present; at this point in time: now
it would seem that; it would appear that: apparently or probably
in the nature of; along the lines of: like
in view of the fact that; on account of the fact that; for the reason that: because or since
pertaining to; in connection with;
in reference to; with/in regard to: about
in the amount of; for the purpose of: for
to be in a position to; in order to/that;
with a view toward: to
in the event that; if it should turn out that: if
close down, close up: close
rested up, divided up, finished up, up until:(Strike “up”)
past history; past experience: history or experience
end result: result
sum total: total
root cause: cause
total effect: effect
basic fundamentals: fundamentals or basics
consensus of opinion: consensus
potential promise: potential or promise
free gift; free pass: gift, pass
true fact: fact
repeat again: repeat
referred back to: referred to
dates back to: dates to
new record: record
new recruit: recruit
new innovations: innovations
ATM machine: ATM (M stands for
“machine”: automated teller machine)
PIN or VIN number: PIN or VIN
(N stands for “number”)
HIV virus: HIV (V stands for “virus”)
foreign imports: imports
large in size: large
blue in color: blue
round in shape: round
personal friendship: friendship
strangled to death: strangled
at about 10 p.m.: at or about 10 p.m.
12 noon; 12 midnight: noon, midnight
2 a.m. in the morning: 2 a.m. or 2 in the morning
equally as good: equally good
Easter Sunday: Easter